I am an owl

I am so lucky to be living my life dream and purpose: Serving people and helping people get what they want out of life.

Sometimes I forget why I chose to do this. Sometimes I’m on auto pilot (mostly we all are)  and I just go about my day, yanno? Sometimes I wonder how i got into it in the first place.

And then something like Sunday happens. I was having lunch with a client who is also a business partner and who is also a new friend. (Interesting what relationships can do and where they can take you, eh). We were with another friend as well at a lunch BBQ, talking about life and personalities. When our other friend asked, “Who does Michael remind you of?” to my client friend.

He paused and looked over to his upper right in the distance, going deep into thought. He stayed there for a few seconds and we waited patiently in silence. I could feel myself somewhat nervous and excited.

“Michael is an owl,” he said. “Woah!” I thought, “Cool!”

Immediately, he breaks out into a vivid storytelling moment he looks like he’s been waiting to express. “Michael is like the owl in Winnie the Pooh! (Do you guys remember Winnie the Pooh?) My nervousness disappears and turns into some confusion but the excitement stays.

It helps that he’s had about 5 glasses of wine at this point, and Im sure he’s feeling pretty good.

“In Winnie the Pooh, what happens? Pooh wakes up every morning looking for what? For honey! And he never has any. He goes looking in the hundred acre wood and everywhere else and never finds any. But who has the honey? The owl. Pooh always get the honey from Owl.” (I melt and get a little teary eyed as I understand what he’s saying.)  “Michael is like the place you can go to get what you need. Like honey, for Pooh.” … I need a moment here.

(Tilt head back, look to the sky, and thank the clouds I’m alive. Feel gratitude flowing all over me for this moment. Soak in the metaphor and appreciate every bit of this )

With all good intention

I feel completely honoured, humbled, touched, moved, inspired, and very happy. Thank you so much for this.

It helps that he is a future writer. He is currently writing a book and has gotten off to a really, really great start. I seriously look forward to his work. He obviously has a way with words and a way of saying things, like beautiful poetry. I dont think I did it justice. He will be a much better writer than me. I’ll share his work here when its done. You had to be there. I am so thankful and fortunate to have wonderful clients like this. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

A great reminder, why I choose to do what I do. #startwithwhy

The Radically Undersexed

I agree. Much of humanity just might be undersexed. Although according to this woman, the MAJORITY OF PEOPLE ARE UNDERSEXED. What’s up with that? Well, if you think about all the rigidity, and frustration and congestion out there in the world… it’s a pretty damn good symptom of the pent up, tense, on edge people that are out there. And that might be you reading this, and it might not. There’s also the numbness caused by TV, over stimulation, fixation, stress, bombardment of EMF’s, electronics, over worked, over weight, over eating, diseases, compulsions, despression etc.

Thankfully, people are waking up. And people like Kim Anami are doing something about it by sharing their message and their beliefs. Its making a difference out there in helping people FEEL, FEEL GOOD, FEEL SATISFIED, and FEEL LOVED. FEEL CONNECTION. FEEL EACH OTHER. FEEL THEMSELVES.

All I know is, I am a BIG supporter of people having more sex.

You can look up the benefits of health when having sex anywhere. Here’s a few: Happiness, joy, calmness, focus, spiritual connection, improvement of your health, greater concentration, deeper connection to humanity, increase in love, ability to feel compassion, relief of depression, sadness, grief, and I could go on and on.  This info should be in schools, it should be in sex ed classes. But it isn’t.

Why sex? What kind of sex?

Safe sex, happy sex, feel good sex, slow sex, oral sex, quickie’s, sex by candlelight, sex with lovers, sex with friends, friends with benefits, romantic sex, tantric sex, cathartic sex, therapeutic sex, make up sex, experimental sex, orgasmic sex, fun sex, aggressive sex, sensual sex. And more.

Wow. Didn’t know there were that many kinds of sex did ya? Get out there and have sex! And always, be safe. Gone are the patriarchal needs of society, government, and institution, and here is a new era of freedom, liberation, compassion, and connection!

Good sex to you all! Go out and get some, give some and share some.

PS: Dad If you’re reading this, no Im not saying everyone should go and swap fluids and be reckless. Thanks.

Second Chances are important

We all mess up.

We’re not always our best 100% of the time. Its impossible to be your best self ALL OF THE TIME. I wish it were true. But it just isn’t always possible. We are human beings. And human beings, by default can fuck shit up sometimes. We make mistakes, and do stupid things here and there. (See history.)

So its important to give second chances. We can’t always nail every shot, crush every presentation, hit the mark, get the bulls eye every time. Same thing in your relationships. If you can’t forgive, forget about it. We have to open up ourselves to grant second chanes.

If you meet someone, and they dont leave a good first impression, well that happens. But what if they really are a great person. But they’re having an off day. They just received some bad news. They got into a fender bender just before meeting or seeing you.

“Don’t judge a book by its cover.” Yep. Well, “The first impression isnt always the best one.” Sometimes the second one is. If someone can restore your faith in them, after a second chance, thats even more impressive!

I’ve met someone and had my judgements about them. I stuck to them, sure. And then the second time I met them, they wow’d me. Sometimes it was an employee, or a new hire. Sometimes it was someone I met at an event. A lady I’d met.

Second chances = compassion. Compassion = wisdom. This can mean more happiness, more peace, less stress, and less frustration for you. But if you’re in a relationship, or dating someone… Remember, we’re all human. Things don’t always flow 100% of the time. There are bumps, and hills. Sometimes chaos. If we aren’t willing to go through the ups and downs, then whats the point of being on the roller coaster in the first place?

The ups and downs of relationships

The Essentials: Loving Yourself

There’s a lot of talk these days about loving yourself out there in guru land, and spiritual healer/coach world. A world I know well and I’m somewhat a part of (by association I guess). I completely agree with that advice, and its something I’ve always believed. (My commitment to myself at the beginning of this year was to be good to myself. Something I sometimes need a reminder of.) But I am going to share about it in a different context right now. One I know well…

(This is an excerpt from one of my favourite chapters called  “Starting Out” – In my upcoming book titled “Find Em & Keep Em: A Guide to Attracting the Right Partner)

You can’t really love someone, without loving yourself 

 Wow, if this isn’t one of the most important pieces in the entire book. It is imperative that you love yourself. Period. Now, some of you will have this handled, and others will not. And many of you won’t even know it. But the thing is, if you aren’t in love with yourself, you won’t be able to really love someone else. [***GOLDEN NUGGET***] If you are always finding faults in someone else, it’s likely because you find a lot of faults with yourself. The majority of times, the people I work with who have trouble with love, have deeply rooted unresolved issues with themselves, sometimes dating back to childhood. And actually, this is perfectly normal in our world and society, and very common everywhere. Some people say, “Everyone has baggage” or “Everyone has something going on.” Well it can be very true. Where do we get taught to deal with our stuff? When do we get the tools to repair the damage done to our hearts, minds and souls? We don’t. It is not taught in school. Your parents may give you some advice yes, but even theirs comes through a filter of their own stuff. You can get your computer repaired, you home repaired, your clothes repaired. But where can you go to repair and heal your self? Thankfully, there are plenty of things you can do, to really resolve those issues for yourself. I highly recommend it. (See my suggested resources at the back of the book. All my resources are either personally used or validated by me, or people in my life whom I trust.)

Also, if you aren’t happy with yourself, what on earth makes you think you will be happy with someone else? What makes you think you will be able to make another person happy if you can’t be happy first by yourself? This may irritate and even offend some of you but you must deal with it if you want to be truly happy in a relationship and in your life. Even worse, a lot of people get into relationships to try and fill a void that is missing in their lives. And they try to find a partner to fill that void. But that’s all backwards!

 

In my opinion, and many other experts would probably agree, it is no one’s job to make you happy. Now I’m not saying, your partner shouldn’t make you happy, absolutely they should! Think of all the great wedding day speeches where the bride and groom exclaim with joy, “You make me so happy!” It’s wonderful! It really is, but it can’t be the sole mission of your partner to make you happy.

I was once in a relationship where I fell in love hard, with a wonderful girl. She still is wonderful and we still talk to this day. (She proofread this part of the book… Great girl. And thought it was about her. But this was about me. It was all about me and what choices I had made.) However, I didn’t notice that by the time we were together for 10 months, the basis of our relationship (for me) became about fixing a problem, where I thought I had to make her happy. I was doing everything I could for months to try and have her be happy, and nothing worked. I was so exhausted from trying to open and run a business in that same year that I decided and I was adamant we had to take a vacation. (Also because I thought it would make her happy) We were sitting on the beach in Dominican Republic, an all inclusive resort, where for a week, we got to abandon everything and forget about it all and bask in paradise, and yet… she still wasn’t happy. I sat there bewildered, ‘Here we are away from it all, in paradise, and she isn’t happy?’ It then hit me like a ton of bricks. I understood then in that moment, that I thought it was my job to lift her sorrows. Anyone could see I was acting that way and doing everything I could just to keep some consistency in her smile. And I don’t know when I took it on like it was my mission… But it was clear to me that I had. Well guess what. It wasn’t my job. And it isn’t yours and it isn’t anyone else’s.

Happiness and love are connected. Happiness is a choice and so is loving yourself. Truth is, I stopped loving myself for a little while when I was in that relationship near the end. And once I realized that… well that just couldn’t be. Not for one more minute.

The best sex you’ve ever had – keeps getting better

How close have you come to Mind blowing, earth shattering, core shaking, body trembling, spirit-connecting, unbelievable sex? Do you know its out there? Do you have it? Do you want it?

I used to have good sex. I used to have great sex. And now I have the above.  Really. That’s what is possible. I hope others get there. I know that they can. You reading this, 🙂 I wonder how you feel about your sex life? Would you like an even better sex life?

Wherever your sex life is, I hope its great. No I hope its beyond great. And I hope you get there. My intention is that this post gives you some insight into what is possible and your sex life and how to get there. I believe our sex lives can always expand and grow and become better, and better.

 

I believe there are levels.  Life is full of levels. Levels of happiness, levels of connection, levels of love, levels of career, success, growth, satisfaction great sex and more.

It wasn’t long ago I discovered the levels, or differing degree’s of amazing sex. I’ve always enjoyed sex (The key to a great relationship.) I enjoy romance, intimacy, foreplay, sex and all aspects of physical connection. And I receive a lot of satisfaction from pleasing my partner and being pleased. You should too! (Another Key to great intimacy.)

I’ve always been sexually active and for me, its an important part of loving someone. Expressing yourself sexually with your partner, it’s a huge part of expressing your love. Anyway, I had a couple of tantric experiences with someone who was experienced in that area, when I wasn’t. It did a lot for me! I was surprised by how great it actually was! (But not surprised that it was great in the first place.) I read some tantra books quickly. And shortly after, I had a brand new kind of sexual experience with another person! WOW!! A fully connected, new, expansive, deeply sensational experience! And I’ve since been able to discover it more and more, and share it more and more with my partner since then.

So yes it was like that. And it was more than that.

I’d had sex with this woman before and it was great, really great. The first time we had sex, we knew there was a connection.  But this time…. Wow. This was different. Something happened. Something else was going on between us. This was the kind of sex that is so euphoric, it leaves you feeling like you just had a pull from a golden cigar made by god. Which makes you light headed, carefree, overjoyed, and you feel like you are literally in the clouds. You feel in a dream state, in a great way.

Was it me? Was it her? Was it our connection? I believe so. I believe it was our deep, deep connection to each other, which we nurtured and explored over time. (What real intimacy is all about!) We talked, because communication is intimacy. We were very comfortable with each other, which makes intimacy so much more beneficial to both people.

The best sex you’ve ever had, could keep getting better.

What is the access to love?

Is love present in your life? Do you have the love that you want and need?

First, to look at what the access to love is, we should look at what prevents us from being ABLE to access love. This might sound crazy, but your access to love is giving up something. Love requires us to LET GO. TRUE LOVE; the fullest, most beautiful love, often requires us to surrender. (I didn’t write the rules of love, its just what I have observed, practiced and taught others, with results.)

If you are without love in your life right now, it is likely because you are holding onto something. Something you consciously or unconsciously refuse to let go of. A easy one is the giving up of being right.

One person I worked with had a subconscious belief which she was holding onto called “I’m unworthy of a relationship”. She was 36 years old and her last relationship was 14 years ago. (Ready? Worthy? Time?) We worked together for only 2 months, shifted her beliefs, thoughts and feelings, and I am happy to say now that she has found someone amazing and they are truly in love, with big plans for the future. Conversely, I know someone else who is expecting love and her perfect lover to fall right into her lap, without having to make any shifts herself. This person refuses to make any adjustments, is 39 years old and expects her love to just come to her when the time is right. Whats wrong with that?

Well, shes been using this for over 3 years with no results. That is a stubborn belief. She refuses to make any adjustments. Its been over 1 year since she has had sex, 7 years since her last relationship and nothing has happened. (Funny thing is, by todays standards, the latter person would be considered a lot more attractive than the 1^st.)

Her access to love is her shift, her willingness to adjust. But… No adjustment = no access love. No shift = nothing different. What is driving her is arrogance and pride, her need to stay comfortable and stay the same. In both cases, a shift can be made, often times a simple shift, and that creates a full access to love. With the previous woman, she was willing to shift, and she did. And tapping into the access, surrendering, granted her love. With the latter woman, she believes she knows it all, and that gives her no access. She is holding onto her opinion, and her know it all attitude.

Its funny… It doesn’t take long. It doesn’t take much. Love opens it doors to you quite quickly, if you are willing to give into the access. and can create enough of it for you. Each person’s access is different and unique. With some of my clients, oftentimes, they see results quickly and start meeting great people. But it stems from 2 things: 1) their willingness and their shift 2) my ability to find their access. Thankfully, Im good at what I do. (phew)

Love is available. Everyone has the access. Love places no limitations. Love has no discriminating factors. The Access to love is available to anyone, anytime, if you’re willing to participate and let love have its way with you.

Happiness is a fish that you can catch

Yes, this is an ‘Our Lady Peace’ album title from the 90’s, but its also true. One of the reasons we look for love and relationships with others is happiness. We look for happiness in others. We look to be happy with our partner. It can be said that one of the keys to a happy life is falling in love with another, and spending the rest of your life together like a fairy tale, sure. We grow with these stories as children, and we’re shown the bliss one can have once the best partner is met. “Happily ever after” right? …”You complete me,” right? We see it right in front of our faces, with our parents when we’re young. (Ideally! What child doesn’t want to see their parents happy?) I remember fondly many times… walking into the kitchen or living room and seeing my parents hugging, kissing, and pinching each others bums. They were happy! I was happy that they were happy!

Finding happiness with another person is perfectly okay. And it can’t be a substitute for your happiness. When I work with clients, I help them find their happiness first, usually before finding their partner; before entering a relationship. So why do I say, the happiness you are looking for in another can’t be your substitute? One must learn to be happy first, before looking to be happy in another. Otherwise, your relationship is not likely to last. See the happiness you receive being with another will fade, if you aren’t secure with yourself, or happy with who you are. The relationship has a pretty good chance to dissipate quickly. And that actually has nothing to do with the other person. (One of the underlying causes for divorce.)

Its all about you. When you learn how to be happy yourself first, you can be happy in any circumstance or with any partner. This is actually why you can be happy with anyone, and you can happy in any relationship. YOU FIND A WAY TO BE HAPPY! And then, and only then your relationship has a REAL chance.

How to be happy yourself, and find your happiness at any point in life:

• Remember what makes you happy, and go and do it. Playing music, going to parks, fixing cars, writing, painting, acting, cooking, playing sports, exercising, dancing, martial arts, etc.
• Try out different activities and do things you’ve never done before. Get out of your comfort zone. Do some unconventional things, possibly things you’ve never done before: bungee jumping, run a marathon, sky diving, rock climbing, flying.
• Get together and hang out with people more, see old friends, meet and make new friends, get to know people. Knowing others helps you know yourself.
• Distance yourself from things and people who make you unhappy, or are toxic for you. I know this can be hard to do, but it can be essential and overall great for not just your life, but your happiness too.
• If you are not sure, ask people questions, positive ones, different ones aside from your everyday norm’s. “What do you like about your life? What are your favourite qualities? What do you like to do for fun? What makes you happy?”

Live long and be happy. And may you find your mate, and be happy in any situation, always, always…

Michael